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New Release
The Fairway Of Life
Simple Secrets To Playing Better Golf By Going With The Flow ~
Rand Scott Marquardt
Life & Mental Golf Performance Coach 
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FacebookBecoming a Better Golfer By David Zmikly
Hi Rand, I’m excited to share a breakthrough I’ve recently experienced. First, thank you for your commitment to yourself, the game of golf, and to this amazing website…I am inspired and it’s time for a change!
My game has been the same for 10 years or more, as you know, pretty stagnant. Sure, I’ve had a few decent rounds, but for the most part I’ve hovered around the low to mid 90’s. Through your guidance however, I’ve chosen to step out of myself to observe who and how I’ve been being, on and off the course. Like most, I’ve always wanted to score better, but I can see now that my approach to the game is what has hindered me. Every time I’ve played in the past, I’ve gone to the course carrying my baggage (not my golf bag); fear, doubt, worry and pride. “What if I play bad? I don’t want to lose money! Will people get upset if I suck?” Sometimes I could hide these inevitable landmines, and begin with a couple pars, possibly even a birdie, but sooner than later the demons would surface and get the best of me…all because of my ‘concern’ of being able (or not) to shoot a low score. The focus of my game was always the score, never on really enjoying myself, the comradery of friends and being grateful for the beautiful surroundings. Even when I tried to tell myself to relax and enjoy, my subconscious was constantly talking about score, score, score! I had to ‘look good’ and thought I could only be happy if I played well. Consequently, every bad shot, bad hole and bad round left me disappointed, again.
I remember playing an outing with 8-10 guys at Pine Knob, and being so disgusted with my game that afterward I got in my car and left without a word to anyone…what a loser! Another round I threw my 4-iron into a 40 ft. pine tree surrounded by junipers, and never found it. I couldn’t have been a good sport if I tried.
The last couple years though I’ve found peace with letting go of worrying about the outcome, even when I knew I wanted to ‘look good’ but couldn’t. My mind was made up that “My score is my score, so I’ll just accept it.” This did give me relief, although it didn’t lower my score. I simply resigned myself to the fact that I sucked no matter how hard I tried, so I might as well get used to it and enjoy myself anyway I decided to just give up on even trying as soon as my game went to hell (which was ususally on the front nine), and drink away my misery on the back.
That was then, this is now. As we talked about last night, I’ve never been so inspired and excited about my game. Your guidance and wisdom hit me like a brick Rand, and I got it. I got that ‘Going With the Flow’ means going with the flow of life, realizing and understanding that we are all connected to the omnipotent Energy of the Universe/God, and by virtue of the Law of Attraction and Deliberate Creation, we are creating our own reality every day! Our thoughts, words, feelings and emotions are all energy, so that which we radiate draws back to us an equal energy in response. So, I get now how I can harness this amazing power that we all have, and use it to my advantage in my golf game, as well as in life. I’m vibating like crazy, knowing now that I can go out to the course with confidence, and play a game with myself, inside of my game and actually have fun
I heard Jack Nicklaus say during an event a few weeks ago something I had never considered in my 25 years of playing, something you’ve also suggested. He always first visualized the end result of every shot, and then the flight or roll of the shot, and then let the picture create the swing. Wow, what a concept. I’ve felt that my visualization was good, but I never let go and surrendered my swing. I always tried to control it, and there in fact was the problem.
I had an epiphany, in realizing the problem and understanding the power of the solution. Never before have I had the genuine confidence to say that I could break 80, and now I know that I can and I will, this summer. The idea for me is to play a game with myself, within my game. I’m excited knowing that all I have to do is let go of the ’score’ and trust that my visualization and alignment with Well-Being will lead the way. In this knowing, I accept that I will have good shots and bad, I am where I am and it will take time to improve…and I will! So each round will be a game for me to become aware and observe myself in action, focus on each shot (not even the hole), accept the outcome without attachment and practice being grateful, for my friends, the surroundings and my growth. Feeling good and accepting the results will naturally lead to a better game, and the better it gets the better it gets. I already know it’s going to work because I remember clearly instances in the past when I called shots beforehand (being cocky), and to my amazement they manifested…instantly! Had I only understood the power that’s been harnessed and patiently awaiting to assist…but that’s okay, I’m perfectly fine with it. I’ve come to the realization that being happy is more important than being a ‘low score’ whether I accomplish it or not, so my key to enjoying golf and life, is to unconditionally accept my game exactly as it is, and exactly as it is not. And for that, I am grateful.
Thanks my Friend, you’re the best!
David Zmikly
“The will is greater than the skill!”
How To Change The Things I Want To Change
The Serenity Prayer – “God, grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, the courage to change the things that I can, and the wisdom to know the difference,” Dr. Reinhold Niebuhr.
First, you must understand which of these three life principles fit your situation. You must ask yourself with sincere honesty if you have control over the only corner of the universe you can control – yourself. If you can change, then welcome courage into your life. It takes courage to step outside the confines of your own self-induced comfort zone. Yes, growth can be and usually is messy. With ease and grace you can move through what at times may seem like the valley of death or the roar of the lion.
The simplest and most direct method to change is acknowledged and felt within the concept of the Nike slogan…Just Do It! It is called having heart and desire; a one-minded focus and a definiteness of purpose; having a dream, and keeping on! Others would say never give up. I prefer keeping on keeping on. Always reminding your self to keep on.
Sometimes your dream may feel like a million miles away just a day or two before it actually manifests. Very often you are less than 3 feet from gold. Keep digging…keep on moving forward. Keeping on in the direction of your hearts desire is what really makes our heart sing. Just remember who you really are – a brilliant and magnificent human being…a spiritual being living a physical existence…a leading edge extension of Source Energy. It’s about feeling worthy, because you are born worthy. It’s about feeling deserving, because you are born deserving. It’s about being born of pure love and pure joy, because you are pure love and pure joy.
Love is all there is. I’m just reminding you until you remember. It’s our dance-with-life to be in vibrational harmony with this understanding…believing in our selves, loving our selves, allowing the Well-Being in, feeling outrageous joy, and knowing it! Jack Nicklaus and other great champions knew in their minds they would hit a great shot before they actually did it. You can too! It’s called being in The Zone – pure positive energy going with the flow ~. Our work therefore is to keep on reaching for more of these good feeling thoughts – the best feeling thoughts we can at this moment in time. Allow the spiral to move us upward ever enhancing more and more of the good stuff that life is serving up. Pretty soon we end resonating in these good feeling spaces more often than not. And when we’re a tad off we can embrace it that much better than before.
If by chance you’re feeling stuck, confused, upset, angry, disconnected, out of alignment, frustration and if by chance you’re “…repeating the same behaviors over and over again expecting different results,” Einstein’s definition of insanity, then you’ve got to change the way you think. Thinking about always choking, always getting nervous over an “important” putt, that you’re never going to get any better, that the demons or golf gods are getting the best of you, that you’re not that good, not that worthy, not that deserving, that you can’t, that you’re embarrassed or worried about looking good or pleasing others, that you’re playing against another opponent will only keep on drawing more of those experiences into your game. You cannot deactivate a negative belief in order to get better…it only draws more of the same experience into your life. Sure once you make the commitment to be something new there will appear to be obstacles or set backs or ridicule that lie in the way. These are all illusions. And you can find a way to move around them, over them, or through them. For the truth of the matter is, you can be, do, or have whatever your heart desires. And if you don’t know that, then that’s the problem.
In all of these incidences above where you find yourself struggling you are quite literally paddling against the current. You’re resisting the natural flow. The first place to begin is to stop paddling so hard, stop trying so hard to figure this out…find some relief. Here’s the deal: you’ve got to find a way to feel good without having “that” condition change. Your dream will arrive that much quicker if you can first be happy without it. Because just the thought of not having it is a form of limited belief, which keeps you stuck in a lack mentality. So, what do I do if I have thought some of these kinds of thoughts that have not been in my best interest?
· I’m afraid
· I’m worried
· I judge myself too harshly
· I beat myself up
· I get mad at myself too often
· I choke
· I suck
· I have negative thoughts that get the best of me
· I think I can’t
· I’m scared
· I don’t want to hold another back…by looking for my lost ball all the time
· I get the yips
· I get ahead of myself
· I lose focus
· I’m trying
· I hold on to past failures
· I get result oriented
· Sometimes I’m just not having any fun
· I’m supposed to be better
· I don’t want to embarrass myself
· I’m not worthy, not deserving
· I want to win so badly that I’m feeling the lack of winning
· Yeah but, if only, it’s someone else’s fault, it’s a bad lie, etc., etc., etc.
· Poor me
So, these are the kinds of thoughts that are currently out of wack with our desire that are holding us back from living the life of our dreams.
Let’s acknowledge the fact, that we’ve thought some thoughts are hindering us. And some of the things we have allowed to be part of our experience are not easy to change; otherwise we would have done so by now. We’re kind of lost and we’re asking for some kind of relief, some kind of help, some kind of guidance and understanding into the mystery of life on and off the golf course. We’re looking for some kind of courage to change the things we can. Ask.
You’ve asked and now it is given. It’s time to take that leap of faith and just do it! You’ve got your dream; now take some action. The how’s will begin to present them selves through your commitment. You will be shown the way through providence or divine inspiration. It is as simple and as complex as that!
Understand this – the way you are feeling before the golf shot is an exact match to what you will get. If you keep thinking what you’ve always thought, then you will always get what you’ve always gotten. Hmmm…change the way you think and feel and you will change what you will get…brilliant deduction Einstein.
What’s the solution? You’ve got to start training your subconscious mind to think like a champion.
You’ve got to start activating more beneficial beliefs. You’ve got to give more “airtime” upon what you want. You’ve got to point yourself into the direction of your desires, or what you prefer. In the moment you understand that I’m not there yet, but I’m at least pointed toward it. In other words, I am where I am. This is the literal and vibrational understanding of what it means to be at peace with your self – both on and off the golf course.
Pretty soon old beliefs will fade away so far, so fast that you have a hard time even remembering what it was like before. Pretty soon you’ll end up creating the life of your dreams. Our purpose in life is to create our purpose. It’s why we have a vision, desire, dreams, intuition, intention, and visualization. It’s the quickest way to get from where we are to where we want to be next. The same works for each golf shot as well. Paint the picture and gravitate towards it.
Life and Golf are supposed to be fun – right now!
Embrace the highs and lows along the fairway of life, give appreciation and gratitude along your stroll, and be happy right now – no matter what? Why, because life is unfolding perfectly just the way it is. Sometimes I like to think perfectly imperfect just the way it is. Nevertheless, when you go back and connect the dots to your life and golf, you too will understand why it is you went through the challenges you did, and how wonderful that really was for the agenda and growth of your soul.
In other words, can I take the punch in the gut (a ball hit out of bounds, in the weeds, picker bushes, tall rough, thick trees, 3 putts, dubbed chips, bad break, choked down the stretch, and on and on) and still feel good? If you can’t then that’s the problem – and what you resist, persists. Once this concept begins to sink deeply into the depths of your soul, your life and golf will never be the same ever again. Everything changes with this new perspective. And guess what…shhh…there will be fewer times where you actually do take the punch in the gut, which means you will get more of what you really do want more often then every before.
Likewise when things are going along extremely well and you begin to feel that extra stress and pressure to keep on performing outside your comfort zone, can you still feel good and embrace the present moment? By the way – I work directly with individuals about lowering their comfort zone - more about all of that later.
Here’s the key to getting what you want. First you have to know what you want. And the only way to know what you really want is to know yourself. And the only way to know yourself is to be yourself. And the only way to be yourself is to listen to your heart and feelings – the language of your soul. Isn’t that something, be who you really are – how simple, how profound. What I do is coach, guide, and support others in removing the blocks, obstacles, or resistances that lie in the way to The Zone – the going with the flow. If you can tell me what you want, I can show you how to get it.
Back to being happy right now. My mentor, Neale Donald Walsch recently stated, “On this day of your life, dear friend, I believe God wants you to know…that you can be happy right here, not tomorrow, not in ten minutes, but now. You can be happy right now. Byron Katie said that, and she is right. Happiness is allowing yourself to be okay with what is, rather than wishing for, and bemoaning, what is not. Obviously, what is is what is supposed to be, or it would not be. The rest is just you, arguing with life. Somewhere along the way you will have to learn to just Trust Life. (Read that, “Trust God.”) Why not start today?”
Trust life and let life know that it can trust you.
Once you learn to just trust life that it is unfolding perfectly imperfect just the way it is, you can then move from what-is to what-is becoming or what you prefer. The moment you embrace the opposite of who you really are is the moment you evolve in quantum leaps to what we do prefer. Because if we keep giving our attention to what-is then we keep regurgitating the same story over and over again. It’s why Tiger is constantly thinking about becoming even better. I invite you to do the same.
Embrace what-is, be happy now, and eagerly anticipate what-is becoming, what you prefer to be next. Point yourself, your kayak downstream into the direction of your dreams. Got it?
The first two questions must be answered in this order, followed by the third:
1) Who am I?
2) Where am I going? And finally…
3) Who’s coming with me?
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