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The Fairway Of Life
Simple Secrets To Playing Better Golf By Going With The Flow ~
Rand Scott Marquardt
Life & Mental Golf Performance Coach 
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Competitive Spirit & Temper
Even Tiger Woods can do “better”…
I’ve been, wanting to write about this apparent insidious dichotomy for quite some time. For most of us having a competitive driven spirit with a burning desire to be our best almost seems to go hand in hand with short outbursts of temper tantrums whenever we hit what we consider a bad shot, or we at least give it some internal muttering. Does it have to be this way? Do you have a choice to be angry or not? What I have come to understand is to take the high road whenever I can when it comes to this apparent catch-22. Is it a perfect science, absolutely not! Like all of life, it’s an eternal process to become better than you used to be. You want to get so mad at yourself then finally you decide not too. That’s a big change and a big adjustment in most of our set patterns of behavior. And it is possible to do this WITHOUT losing one ounce of competitive fire, only to gain a “better” golf game in the long run! Is it possible to not lose your temper after a “bad” golf shot and still play your best from here on out? ABSOLUTELY! What do you think?
Geoff Ogilvy came to this understanding of taking the high road several years ago. Now look at his demeanor, without losing one ounce of his competitive fire. In an interview with John Huggan from Golf Digest after winning the 2006 US Open, Ogilvy shared some enlightening insights that he has come to understand with his golf game.
Q: As a young player, were you impatient on the golf course?
A: Oh, yeah. I was horrendous. I could hit five good shots in a row, then one bad one. I’m sure I was a nightmare when I was 16 or 17, as many at that age are.
Q: What sort of stuff did you do?
A: I’d throw clubs around. I broke a few. I used a lot of four-letter words. The temper stuff is easy to fix psychologically. You either get angry or you don’t get angry; you have a choice.
A: I realize now that I was getting angry for everyone else around me, not for me. When you get that, that’s the day you fix it. When you play by yourself, you never smack the bag with the club, or get angry…ever…because there’s no audience. That’s my theory, anyway. After you hit a shot you get angry because you want the person you’re trying to impress to think that you’re better than this. I think that’s the root of it for nine out of ten people. The other one is purely psycho.
Which one are you? Which one am I? Which one is Tiger?
Tiger Woods is still in the process of working through his own self-criticism and impatient issues. He gets mad at himself and drops some four-letter words, or uses the Lord’s name in vain, which I think is just a habit of attraction, not an intentional jab at God or Jesus. He’s stubborn, like many of us, as the day is long. He still thinks he has to get mad at himself whenever he hits a less than desirable shot to keep his fire and competitive spirit, which, by the way, I am certainly not judging. I am merely observing. I have been there most of my adult life.
Tiger states it this way after his comeback tied for 4th place finish in The Masters, “I received some criticism for bad language, which I apologized for immediately after Saturday’s round,” Woods said on his blog. “It’s tough when you’re in a competitive environment and in the flow of a tournament. I’m not perfect. All I can say is I’m trying to do everything I can without losing my fire and competitive spirit.”
The world’s most mentally tough athlete and golfer still struggles with his anger and foul language – perhaps it’s a habitual patterned response? He later apologizes as he seeks to work through this negative perception he is giving the public as a most recognized role model.
The real question is can one control, manage, or “be with” their apparent disgust of their “bad” golf shot while still keeping every bit of their competitive juices flowing? I say absolutely a resounding YES, but I invite you to experiment and experience it on your own. I shared some of this talk with the Petoskey High School golf team recently. Now I share it with a wider audience. These concepts and more are mentioned in my book, The Fairway of Life. Please visit me at http://golfissupposedtobefun.com and sign up for my free newsletter too!
Tiger’s World
You can hardly turn around without hearing about Tiger’s recent fall from grace, or is it? Will Tiger reinvent himself and give the world a new message, one in which his father spoke of? His recent stumble has sure caught our attention, hasn’t it? How else do we learn or remember these kinds of lessons? Is it not the recovering alcoholic who makes the best AA teacher?
Life is always showing us about life itself. In order to receive this higher message someone has to experience adversity first – and those periods are the times of the greatest gain. Tiger’s celebrity status has the whole world looking carefully at this insidious disease called “infidelity.” Who hasn’t had the thought that the grass might be greener somewhere else, if even for a brief spell? Then cast the first stone if you will. The greatest betrayal of all is to oneself. I truly believe the greatest pain from all of this is Tiger’s own internal suffering that he has caused himself. The consequences of our own actions weigh heavily on the exact ones we love the most.
An enlightened Master spoke many years ago, “Do not judge and you will not be judged.” Many with very self-righteous positions will judge this event harshly. Even fellow pro’s have lashed out voicing their strong objections. And in the very moment you judge someone as not being on their path, you are not on yours either. Be very careful to judge another, rather I invite you to simply observe. Notice how you feel when judging another even though you might be right. No, I shall not condemn nor condone the behavior from the world’s most mentally tough athlete and perhaps the greatest golfer of all time. I shall simply observe and ask myself some even deeper questions; like what would love do now or how will this make me a better me? It is my observation that much of the world would rather be right then happy.
You see these kinds of personal issues left unresolved will literally eat away at you on the inside. You may appear to cover them up temporarily, yet sooner or later they will bubble up to the surface. They are like energy draining beach balls that we attempt to hold under water. When we are out of integrity with ourselves it affects all aspects of our lives including our own golf game. Therefore, it is essential to make peace with our past; to make peace with our selves; to come clean; to forgive; to tell the truth; and to reinvent or better our selves by becoming our higher or more authentic Self. That is my hope and desire for Tiger and anyone else who knows why they have received this message today. You just have to go inside – for if you do not go within, you go without. Perfectly imperfect is what we are.
I shall keep on observing Tiger’s World with hope and anticipation that he resolves his personal issues by telling his truth and making peace with himself. I eagerly anticipate his return to golf. I also look forward to the young guns like Anthony Kim, Rory McElroy, Camilla Villegas, and Rickie Fowler giving Tiger a run for his money too!
Tiger Woods Gives Putting Tip To Sean O’Hair
Day one in the final match of the Fed-Ex Tour Championship on The Golf Channel found Sean O’Hair at the top of the leader board leading Woods, Padraig Harrrington, and Stewart Cink by one shot. And to think on Wednesday’s practice round Sean got a putting tip from Tiger to help sharpen his putting stroke.
Imagine someone helping another while competing with or against each other for the same prize. Well, in my new world I know now that my own toughest opponent is myself, and in ultimate reality I’m really not playing against another. However, competition can stimulate our own desire to become better. All the while we help ourselves by helping others – that’s called the infallible formula. I write about these kinds of concepts (and more) in my new book, The Fairway of Life. Tiger practices mentoring and helping others to become even better themselves. As he does, Tiger naturally becomes better himself. I suggest that you practice this wisdom from the ages as well. Cause another to become what you desire to be even more.
The Putting Lesson
“De-lofting” was Wednesday’s lesson and seems to be the key to O’Hair’s newfound confidence with his flat stick. “I tend to deloft the putter and take it a little too square going back,” O’Hair explained, after telling reporters that Woods’ tips were “a little too complicated for you guys.” Woods suggested that O’Hair add loft to the putter for a freer release through the shot. “If you take it straight back and you deloft it,” O’Hair noted, “you’ve got to hang onto it going through or the ball is going to go dead left.” You have to open up the blade going back in order to properly release the putter blade coming through. *Hint – one of those putting arcs from your local PGA professional will help guide you, unless of course you’re tight with Tiger :).
O’Hair says he has much work to do to elevate his putting. “I’m not even close to doing exactly what [Woods] told me to,” he said. “Let’s face it, [my putting] is kind of what’s held me back for a long time.” The guy has a point. While he’s 17th on the PGA Tour in birdies and scoring averages, O’Hair’s 29.61 putts per round has him languishing in the 159th position.
When asked what’s it like taking tips from the world’s best golfer? O’Hair responded, “Getting advice from good players is obviously awesome,” O’Hair said. “But getting it from basically the greatest of all time is pretty cool.” Woods’ good will was no surprise to O’Hair. “We all know how…great of a player [Woods] is,” O’Hair said. “But I think the thing that impresses me more is the quality of guy he is.” The fact that his golf guru is also his opponent was not lost on O’Hair. “I mean, I’m his competition, and for him to help me out like he did was very classy,” he said. The teacher, for his part, was happy to assist. “It’s very simple,” Woods told reporters. “You always help your friends.”
Having Fun
…And did anyone else pick up on Sean’s comments about taking golf too seriously after the putting tips dialogue? Seems everyone wants to write and talk about Tiger giving advice, which is obviously very cool. O’Hair went on to say that for the last 6-7 weeks he wasn’t having as much fun, kind of down on his game. He said, paraphrasing, ‘after all, this is my profession and I’m supposed to take it seriously [he thought]. Yet when I arrived here I decided to let it all go and was just going to relax more and have fun.’ Sean allowed himself to relax and have some fun with his golf. That’s the big reminder to all of us. How easy it is to fall into the trap that it’s serious. Next thing you know we’re not having fun and our scoring reflects that. So, lighten up and have fun with it! Even professionals have to catch themselves from spiraling downward with the fun quotient. All it takes is a simple shift in perspective and many will not allow themselves to “go there” and have fun – they want to take it sooooo damn serious until it kills em. Have fun and lighten up for God’s sake!!! When you’re having fun, the scoring will take care of itself.
“Why am I such a chicken,” Dinara Safina
The 2009 Women’s French Open Final
Tennis and golf are similar sports when it comes to the mind, mental toughness, handling pressure and stress…anxiety, fears, being in the now versus getting ahead of ourselves.
First, congratulations to #7 Swetlana Kuznetsova defeating Dinara Safina #1 in The French Open final 6-4, 6-2.
I enjoy watching those pursuing excellence in their sport of choice. I enjoy observing how athletes handle themselves in being their best. We can learn from the triumphs and the disasters, and treating those two imposters just the same, as Bobby Jones finally began to understand after years of coming in second.
As a life & mental golf performance coach I can certainly relate to the play from both of these tennis giants. I can feel their emotions and thoughts. Swetlana came out on top today…she was the one who was more calm and relaxed. Her thoughts were to go out there and, “have fun and enjoy it.” The pressure fell too deeply on the one who wanted it so badly she ended up pushing it further away. You could see it slipping as she missed shots and started pressing. Finally, she let it out in front of the whole world to see and hear, “Why am I such a chicken,” almost gesturing to her coach as she expressed her truth to herself. Why am I such a chicken is a great question to ask ourselves.
NBC TV announcers and analysts Mary Carillo and John McEnroe stated many keen observations about this match. It is my mission to pass these observations on to you in hopes that you and I will take our own game to new levels of mental toughness overcoming the fears, the chicken, or demons that lie within us.
Carillo and McEnroe picked up upon this energy as they witnessed the negative emotions, tenseness, and mental roadblocks get the best of the world’s #1. Carillo noted that Safina allows her nakedness to come through, often expressing her emotions when she breaks down, often crying. It’s my feeling that Safina wants it so badly that she pushes it further away. She prepares herself for this moment…yet the moment got the best of her. She gets ahead of herself and out of the now, and it is in the now where The Zone resides. “Just get out of your own way,” Carillo stated. “Easier said than done Mary, it’s a whole lot cozier up here,” McEnroe noted. “Just stay in the moment here…classic one shot at a time and this match would be far from over,” McEnroe continued as we all felt the pressure on Safina’s shoulders. As the breakdown continued there is a tendency to spiral further out of control, McEnroe reiterated, “You can see how the nerves are wreaking havoc on Safina.” The double fault to end the match ended the nightmare.
Now it’s a question of what can Safina do to keep her faith and belief in herself, so that the nightmare goes away? The answer: you’ve got to keep activating more and more beneficial beliefs and allow them to take root into your self-image, which is lodged within your subconscious brain, which runs everything in your life, including your tennis and golf game. Eventually you give more “air time” to beneficial beliefs and you literally drown out less beneficial ones – you become a new you.
So how do we create a winner’s self-image? Is it a perception that in order to win we then can believe in ourselves, that we are losers unless we win? Or, do we believe in ourselves, be happy, enjoy the moment and let winning take care of it self? How does one win? What is the secret or magic formula? What is the answer to all of this madness? How does one overcome “throwing up” all over oneself on the golf course – similar to what Safina just experienced in The 2009 French Open Final? What can we learn from all of this? What can we do to build that champions self-image?
Sit with these questions and answer them on your own. What do you think? Yes, we must experience this ourselves if we so choose to put ourselves on the line. My answer: it’s about creating a winner’s or champions self-image of ourselves. I show and tell you how to do this in Chapter 15 of my book The Fairway of Life. How much time you invest in yourself is a direct match to what you will reap. For now, seek to find good feeling thoughts no matter what. Stay in the now, and remember golf, like life and tennis, are supposed to be fun!
Dinara Safina is a great champion…and if she doesn’t know it…then that’s the problem! The same goes for all of us. Feed your mind, heart, and soul the nutrition that empowers you – the gift of believing in yourself, and loving yourself just exactly as you are…all the while gravitating toward the picture you are painting of what you prefer. Act as if it is so. “Be as you wish to seem,” Socrates
“I refuse to give into fear, real or imagined, or to be afraid either consciously or unconsciously of anything or anyone.”
“I smile at my obstacles.”
—Tiger Woods
You Say You Want To Become a Better Golfer?
…what are you more committed too?
You say you want to become a better golfer? Have you asked to become a better golfer? You have haven’t you? Do you really, really want it? Is thinking about it kind of scary, wondering if you really could improve? How much time, effort, and energy are you putting into it? Are you visualizing on a daily basis? Are you focusing upon what you prefer? Are you working on those areas you can improve upon? Have you set an intention? Do you have a dream? What are you more committed too? In other words, what are you really doing with your time? And I’m just not talking about your work, your family, your home, etc. I’m talking about those free moments where you could be practicing more mental techniques, more putting exercises, more visualizations, more alignment with good feeling thoughts. How committed are you? Or are you just venting?
Most likely we will find that we really aren’t as committed as we thought we were. Most likely we find that we are just venting our own frustrations with our own poor me self-judgment about ourselves. Perhaps we somehow thought we could fool ourselves? Perhaps we thought if I can only understand my swing…then perhaps I would improve? Look, it’s not my job to give you advice…I’m here to inspire and remind you that the answer and wisdom, lies within you. What do you think it takes to improve, to become better, to be what you desire to be? Here’s what I think: it takes commitment 24/7 training our subconscious minds into becoming the champion we all know ourselves to be, to keep on reaching for better feeling thoughts giving our focus and energy upon what we prefer. And this work that we do to ourselves can really be an enjoyable experience…and it’s supposed to be fun. Life and golf are supposed to be fun. Now if you are happy with where you are then so be it. Just remember nothing stays the same and becoming better, becoming what you desire to be next begins just outside the confines of our own limited and self-imposed comfort zone. We’ve settled for less. Most of us have settled for mediocrity. Ouch!
Now, if you truly desire to become a better golfer…you will be shown the way. You’ve just got to make that inspired commitment…and if your goals don’t scare you, then they are not big enough. The three steps to this process are: 1) You ask, 2) Source Energy (God) / the universe answers, and 3) You align vibrationally with your asking allowing it in and expecting it to happen. Ask and it is given…expect it to be so. You act as if it is so. It’s your work to clear the doubts, the yeah buts, ifs, and I can’t. These kinds of negative programming kill the whole deal. The way we clear our negative programming is to think new thoughts that are in alignment with what we desire - giving more airtime on this…gradually the negative will begin to fade. It’s why the Dalai Lama says, “It is essential to think strongly and forcefully, I can do it,” without boasting or fretting.
The universe always hears our asking, always answers and yes God does work in mysterious ways…most often we will be shown the awareness of the opposite of what we desire to be first. Just remember that in order to understand being calm and relaxed we must first experience being tense and uptight first. In order to understand being with an acceptable and embracing mental mindset attitude we first experience being frustrated and impatient. In order to understand joy and going with the flow, we first experience anger and struggle. How do we go about this business of changing the way we see ourselves? Life is always showing us about life itself. Are you open to hearing the message knocking on your door? The best place to begin is exactly where you are right now. Surrender to this voice, this Source Energy, God within, and let go, allow it to be, just be your self and let it be. This is the moment where things begin shifting. It’s what many spiritual beings call a paradigm shift – you see life through a new lens. The moment you understand that I’m not there yet, but I am at least pointed toward it…I am where I am…is the moment you make peace with yourself and begin your new journey of living the life of your dreams.
The formula is to first have a dream, then you take action, next you will be shown how, then you’re on your way to living the life of your dreams…from ambition and desire to meaning and manifestation. It all starts with your surrendering to your God Source within and in your commitment to playing full out. It’s really about allowing the Well-Being in, being connected, and going with the flow instead of resisting, being out of alignment, and paddling against the current. All emotion is about where you are standing in the stream of life. You are either allowing the Well-Being in or you are resisting it. It’s as simple and as complex as that!
What this takes is an awakening, an appreciation and a connection with your higher (authentic) Self. Connecting with your higher Self is what all champion’s eventually come to grips with. It’s about becoming who you really are. It’s about connecting with this incredible being that your soul already knows itself to be. It’s about getting yourself up to speed with who you are now becoming. Golf and life takes on a whole new perspective and paradigm shift once we awaken and connect more fully to this incredible power within. What is your soul after? What the soul is after is the highest expression of who you really are.
What are you more committed too? Isn’t it about time to get back in the game? I invite you to enjoy the gap from exactly where you are right now eagerly anticipating where you are going next? Begin closing that gap all the while embracing and being happy now. Reach for the best feeling thoughts you can and with enthusiasm and passion desiring to become better than you used to be. It’s about feeling good. The sooner you start feeling good without trying to control all of those exterior circumstances outside of your self, the sooner you will be on your way. So, go ahead and start feeling good right now before you even play…and all the good things in life will come into your experience. Most think that they will feel good when they play well. It doesn’t work that way. You’ve got to feel good no matter what. Soon the better it gets…the better it gets. It’s why champions are tuned in, turned on, and tapped in more often than they used to be. Be a champion! You too are meant to win just like Tiger!
Better Tomorrow
“The greatest thing about tomorrow is I will be better than I am today. I will be better as a golfer, and I will be better as a person. That’s the beauty of tomorrow. The lessons I learn today I will apply tomorrow, and I will be better. It’s a lifelong ambition to get better.”
Tiger Woods said that and he was right. Yet let us not lose sight of today. Remember to enjoy the journey that each present moment has to offer. Embrace each experience (the highs and the lows) while eagerly anticipating your next step down The Fairway of Life.
My purpose and intention is to attract all of those desiring to become a better golfer, a better human being. And in this message, you never know what might come out of this. Like myself, I invite you to embrace the same message that Dr. Wayne Dyer aspires too. “I am no better than anyone else, I am just becoming better than I used to be.”
There are 27 million golfers in the United States of America and perhaps a half billion world-wide. Most, if not all, have experienced some form of anger, frustration, fear of failing or success, and never seem to get any better. It’s a vicious cycle once it starts. This is why I do what I do. I have been there myself. I’m here to offer a new way, a new hope, a new understanding about golf and life…a new understanding that can change everything. This is my unique gift that I offer humanity – the half a billion golfers on the face of the earth. It doesn’t matter if you simply wish to have more fun, break 90, or lower your stroke average by a couple tenths – this program is for all who are drawn to hear this message.
It is my intention to ease the vicious cycle of fear and frustration that we have all allowed to run our lives. How do we do this? By telling a new story, by having a dream, by acting as if it is so for what we do desire, by reaching for better feeling thoughts, by being out of our mind, by allowing the flow of Well-Being, by connecting with who we really are, and by going with the flow – being in The Zone. It’s all of these things and even more. Stay tuned – it’s about being tuned in, turned on, and tapped in.
How does this happen? The first step is to ASK! You must ask for what it is you desire. Next, the universe will answer – always does. The third step is to align with your asking vibrationally and allow it to be. Remember: the “yeah buts” kill the whole deal.
Once you do fully commit to your hearts desire you will be shown the way…miracles unfold as Providence moves too:
· Attitude and demeanor changes
· Awareness and observation heightens
· Consciousness expands
· Understanding increases
· Confidence soars
· Fears melt away
· Shots fly on line
· Putts drop
And so shall it be. Give thanks and gratitude with each next logical step of the way!
Warmly,
“Coach” Rand
Life & Mental Golf Performance Coach
Sport & Athletic Administration, MA
Inspiring Excellence Within!
P.S. It’s not too late to sign-up to participate in our live winter
coaching sessions from the comfort of your home tele-conference style… There are audio coaching files available to get you caught up to speed if you so choose. What are you more committed too?Just click the link below and join in the fun! Isn’t it about time you get back into the game with the desire to more fully express yourself with freedom and less internal resistance!
http://randmarquardt.com/mentaledgegolfcoachingprogram.htm
The Grind & The Zone
Which comes first, the chicken or the egg? In golf I liken the analogy of which comes first, The Grind or The Zone? Which comes first…The Grind so that we can find The Zone or relief so that we can avoid the struggle? How would we know what The Zone is unless we first experienced being out of The Zone and being in a struggle? Perhaps by working through these understandings we can choose to have better control over our own self.
We tend to create this image that golf is hard and it is a grind. While it is certainly an admirable trait to grind it out versus giving up, our aim is to find relief and align ourselves with feeling good, which gives us confidence and a belief in ourselves, otherwise known as being in The Zone. Whereas, The Grind is often thought of as a buckling-down approach—whatever it takes to scrape out our best. Admirable: yet not ideal.
Many of us have a tendency to make things out to be such a struggle, such a grind; most of us end up paddling real hard against the current because we think that is how golf and life is supposed to be: a constant challenge, a hard-fought battle, a grind. Who told you so? Some people even get so good at it, that they actually embrace the grind every time out, perhaps it’s a self-defense concept they created to allow them to make sense of it all. It’s like we hear them saying, “Hey look at me! I’m struggling really hard over here.” Or, after the round, “It was a real grind out there.” Sometimes we give them a pat on the back, “That’s my chip off the old block. Keep up the good work.” However, the truth be told, in those moments of the struggle we end up taking ourselves out of The Zone once again. The grind is some sort of resistance or rationalization that is blocking the flow of Well-Being, which is where The Zone exists. What is causing you to grind it out? And I know sometimes it just feels that way. I’m inviting you to relax into this game, find some relief and learn to go with the flow. Remember golf is supposed to be fun. Many think the answer is to keep on paddling really, really hard–beating more golf balls than ever before. This kind of repetitive vicious cycle keeps repeating itself over and over again. Like Einstein reminds us about the definition of insanity. You can’t solve a problem with the same energy that created it.
I hear you when thinking about how Tiger often talks about how much of a grind it was “out there.” I’m not saying this feeling doesn’t exist. I’m just saying we all can do a little bit better than we used too…even Tiger. And when we do a little bit better than we used too – we end up playing a little better. The spiral moves upward versus the other way around. The better it gets…the better it gets.
Tiger’s grind on the other hand may be slightly different from the rest of us mere mortals, wouldn’t you say? He misses three or four fairways or the pin by 25 feet on a couple occasions and he’s missed the shot. We end up in the blackberry bushes or tall weeds 30 yards from the green. His desires and expectations are a tad higher. Plus, he aligns his vibrational energy to match what he intends and expects. He executes and performs to what he visualizes more often than not. In other words, Tigers allows his intention to be. He’s in alignment with his asking. That’s what makes Tiger tick. What a mindset and focus. Imagine Tiger’s view of the field and that narrow window or rectangle of where he intends to play the shot giving his best effort in this moment on this particular shot or putt. Go be something similar to this mindset yourself. Begin visualizing and narrowing your field. The shot produces the swing, not the other way around. With a mindset like Tiger’s we too can become better tomorrow than we are today.
What you don’t hear is how often Tiger is actually clicking along and playing pretty well. He does play in the now. However, his mindset is always wanting to be better tomorrow than today. That’s his inspiration and motivation. Tiger appears to be never satisfied; yet he is still the greatest ever. He’s hungry and he’s humble. I’d be surprised if he isn’t absolutely ecstatic on the inside for everything he has accomplished and absolutely thrilled with how he plays when he’s on. What I see is that he doesn’t want to lose his edge. He just doesn’t want to be or get complacent. He’s on a mission. It’s called 19 majors – then perhaps more. To be the world’s best means you hold the most majors on your mantle.
Tiger really does play pretty damn good golf after it is all said and done; wouldn’t you say? When Tiger is on – which is often – he is pointing his kayak downstream and going with the flow. It’s just that simple. He’s in alignment with his Source and desire to be his absolute best…world’s best. What more is there? Tiger has set the bar and keeps breaking it. Tiger keeps imprinting even more of a champion’s self-image upon the inner workings of his subconscious mind…and so can you and I.
Wouldn’t it be easier to point your kayak in the direction of the current and simply go with the flow of the stream? Wouldn’t it be easier to allow yourself the freedom to build the sandcastle, skip the stone, or swing the club with your natural most inspired state of being and simply go with the flow? Wouldn’t it be easier to play like you practice, like no one is watching, or execute like it was your practice swing: effortless and less arduous? Wouldn’t it be easier to make your first putt more often than when you drop a second ball in its place? Second putts made. Wouldn’t it be easier if you really knew what you are doing when you are practicing and you were practicing mentally in The Zone? The Flow is The Zone. The Zone is always present. There is only The Zone, a source of Well-Being—which you are either allowing, or not. Everything else is resistance or a block or an obstacle to The Zone that is always flowing.
It’s really pretty simple; remove the resistance, block, or obstacle and allow the Well-Being in. Your Well-Being is The Zone. The Zone is always present. The Zone is going with the flow.
The best analogy I could give you is watching young children play. They’re in The Zone practically all the time. They don’t know any better or any different, they haven’t been socialized or conditioned to our cultural story yet. There is no fear of failure or fear of success they are just being themselves. They’re not being judged or think they are being judged. They don’t think about results, they just do it.
Coaches Notes: A deeper lesson in this whole process is how we encourage, support, and guide another. While our intentions may mean well there is a fine line between critiquing and judging performance and giving advice versus offering positive feedback and offering support and guidance. Asking what questions at the “right” time allows the student to reflect and perhaps make the changes themselves. Invite the student to ask the questions themselves. Invite the student to explore the understanding that the answer and wisdom lies within them. Pointing out body positions through a camera film perhaps allows the student to see potential opportunity for growth.
Another analogy of being in The Zone is when Tiger is throwing darts and sinking putts. Tiger focuses on the moment putting forth his very best effort on this drive, on this swing, and on this putt – and he’s not concerned about his result or outcome until after it happens, which in Tiger’s case most often is a great result. He’s tuned in, turned on, tapped in – he’s locked in on this very moment. Plus he’s like a kid having fun. Where did Tiger get his mental toughness? Was it from Mom and Pop, or within? Is it nurture or nature? Perhaps it’s a little bit of both exposures; whatever he allows to filter into his subconscious mind.
Be Intent – Be As You Wish To Seem
The law of attraction states that which is likened unto it self is drawn. Thoughts create things and thoughts create swings. We become what we think. Intentions are a form of focused thought, similar to a goal, a desire from within, or having a dream. To be intent is to set your intention upon your desire where you literally drown out any other reverberation to the contrary. My friend Melissa from New Zealand and friends have created an entire program called beintent.com focusing on inspiring and drawing out your gifts that lie within.
In the words of Socrates, this means to “be as you wish to seem.” Think about it. Simply be as you wish to seem is such a simple, yet enlightening understanding. The same goes for everything else in our life. Mahatma Gandhi declared that we must be the change we wish to see in the world. To be as you wish to seem comes from a calling deep within your soul…it is your hearts desire and this desire if strong enough will over-ride any other vibration or belief you may have – and most of us carry with us a limited belief system based upon following the ways of the world. Most of us have given up on our dreams and neglected this key inspiration that springs forth from our desire. The real key or secret is to break free from this limited based thinking, get back on your true path, listen to the whisper of your soul, and be your hearts desires – as you wish to seem and act as if it was so.
When we are being as we wish to seem we gravitate toward the picture we are painting in our minds eye. This is what Tiger Woods dreamt about long before he eventually became the world’s #1 golfer. Be as you wish to seem and act as if it is so. Then one day you wake up living your dream. And whenever you are not being as you wish to seem, stop, catch yourself, find relief, and reach for the best feeling thought you can. Tiger refuses to give in to any fear either real or imagined that is out of alignment with his thinking of who he choses to be and become. Tiger knows there is only Well-Being flowing to him and through him. He’s free to fully express himself to his full potential. Isn’t that what we all want - freedom to fully express ourselves to our full potential. You tell me what you want and I’ll show you how to get it! The answer: One by one we let go of all the resistances, obstacles, or illusions we’ve allowed to run our subconscious mind. “Removing the clouds does not cause the sun to shine, but merely reveals that which was hidden all along,” Dr. David R. Hawkins. You see The Zone is like the sun, always flowing.
What kind of golfer do you desire to be? What kind of a person do you desire to be? Go straight into being that. Neale Donald Walsch talks about this be, do, have principle in his Conversations with God books and international speaking engagements. The Be-Do-Have Paradigm is another universal and spiritual law of creation. Most people get it backwards; they think that when they finally have this, then they will be able to do that, and then they can be this. In his book, Conversations with God, Book 3, Neale Donald Walsch discusses this principle with greater clarity. And you can substitute your own descriptions as they relate to your life on and off the golf course. I use Neale’s template and add golf specific examples to it. I find this very interesting as all of life operates the same way.
Most people believe if they have a thing (more time, more money, more love, a better golf game), then they can finally do a thing (write a book, go on vacation, buy a home, take up a hobby, undertake a relationship, really play better golf), which will allow them to be a thing (happy, peaceful, content, in love, or a calm, confident golfer).
In actuality, they are reversing the Be-Do-Have Paradigm. In the universe as it really is (as opposed to how you think it is), “havingness” does not produce “beingness,” but the other way around. First you “be” a thing called “happy” (or “knowing,” or “wise,” or “compassionate,” “calm,” “clear,” or whatever), then you start “doing” things from this place of beingness—and soon you discover that what you are doing winds up bringing you the things you’ve always wanted to “have.”
The way to set this creative process (and that’s what this is . . . the process of creation) into motion is to look at what it is you want to “have,” ask yourself what you think you would “be” if you “had” that, then go right straight to being. In this way you reverse the way you’ve been using the Be-Do-Have Paradigm—in actuality, set it right—and work with, rather than against, the creative power of the universe. Here is the short way of stating this principle: In life, you do not have to do anything. It is all a question of what you are being.
As in golf, so in life it is a matter of what you are being. Your state of beingness sets the stage for what you are doing, what you will have, and for how you will play. Your state of being (focused, clear, creative, artistic, poetic, confident, relaxed, calm, present, machine-like) produces your doing (your takeaway, back swing, rhythm, tempo, lag, whip, strike, follow through) which allows you to have (scoring, enjoyment, fun, prize money). It is the order of life’s paradigm that matters. You are a human being first. So stop trying to find the right and perfect thing to do and start creating the right and perfect thing to be. Be your most inspired state of being on the golf course and allow yourself to do it. Then you will be having fun and the results, scoring, or prize money will take care of itself.
Be as you wish to seem, be your hearts desire, and listen to your feelings, which is the language of your soul. You are brilliant and magnificent, worthy and loved, and if you do not know that, then that’s the problem and it’s high time you get back in the game focusing on the solution. You can be, do, or have whatever your heart desires.
The Magic Formula
Want to play your best golf? It all starts here, right now. It all starts with a thought. We become what we think. A thought is the start of something bigger. Call it whatever you wish. A thought can be a goal, an intention, or a dream. Thoughts bubble up through our asking, which come through our dreams, our prayers, or our meditation. We all are asking beings with new desires. Living the life of our dreams is why we chose to come forth into this magnificent world filled with all kinds of ingredients to choose from.
Tiger first dreamt about being the best golfer in the world. That’s step #1. So, the magic formula works this way.
1. Have a dream and envision the end result first. Really involve all your senses.
2. Start now – take action. You don’t have to wait until you are ready. You don’t have to have it all figured out. You don’t have to know how. You just have to take the next logical step. Commit to taking action – NOW! The how’s will come to you. Try on this quote largely attributed to Johann Wolfgang von Goethe:
Until one is committed, there is hesitancy, the chance to draw back. Concerning all acts of initiative (and creation), there is one elementary truth, the ignorance of which kills countless ideas and splendid plans: that the moment one definitely commits oneself, then Providence moves too. All sorts of things occur to help one that would never otherwise have occurred. A whole stream of events issues from the decision, raising in one’s favor all manner of unforeseen incidents and meetings and material assistance, which no man could have dreamed would have come his way. Whatever you can do, or dream you can do, begin it. Boldness has genius, power, and magic in it. Begin it now.
3. The how’s will come as soon as you fully commit and take action from the thoughts, which have given life to having a dream.
4. Manifestation is living the experience in which you created. One day you simply wake up realizing you are living your dream. It is as simple and as complex as that!
5. Remember the Magic Formula for success, which is absolutely the amount of joy that you feel:
Dream (end result) + Action (commitment) = How’s (Providence – divine inspiration) + manifestation (perceived understanding from the eye of the beholder that you are actually living your dream).
Remember you are brilliant, worthy, and magnificent just exactly as you are. Be who you really are. Align with the abundant stream of Well-Being. That’s what this “The Zone” stuff is all about. Go with the flow!
All successful people practice this formula whether they are aware of it or not. They harness the power of intention and commit to a goal or a dream and move forward—and you can do this too! We all have the same chemistry makeup and ability to succeed with the gifts and talents within us. And it’s all relative to each one of us. We all have our own unique gifts to offer humanity. What we are really asking for is the freedom to fully express ourselves to our full potential. This magic formula will set you on your way.
So, instead of just watching your heroes on television and saying, “I wish I had what they have,” which is a form of projection, focus, lock onto the moment, become mentally strong, and be it and do it yourself! We all are modeling something, we all can dream. Instead of thinking wistfully about the accomplishments of Tiger or Lorena (Ochoa) or any other exemplary person or athlete, choose to model who they are and what they do. Or decide to become something entirely new, on your own, that you envision yourself to be. You have the power within you. Take back your own power – Espavo.
Follow your bliss. Keep on keeping on.
The Better It Gets…The Better It Gets
Tiger Woods is on a mission to become the greatest golfer and champion of all time. A major mindset for him is 19. That’s 19 majors golf championships – one better than the great champion golfer, Jack Nicklaus. Tiger currently stands at number 14. Tiger also talks about getting better all the time. What he did yesterday is gone. He has an intense desire to become better than he used to be. He talks openly about his desire.
The biggest point around this discussion of getting better is the better it gets the better it really does get. When these new positive focus and belief thoughts filter deeply into our subconscious mind we really do gravitate toward and become our new thoughts. Yes, thoughts create things and thoughts create swings. We Become What We Think. That’s the mental game of golf – “The five-inch space between the ears,” Bobby Jones. As you gravitate and fine tune your thoughts upon all the good things you desire the better it really does get. Our success is measured by the amount of joy we feel around these thoughts about who we are, our self-image, which is lodged deeply into our subconscious mind.
Our subconscious mind runs everything in our life, including our golf game. Whatever we feed, supplant, imprint, and deposit into the treasury of our subconscious mind we become. Our subconscious mind is like a computer processing its program to a tee, all the way through our entire round…shot after shot…season after season. It’s like a plane on automatic pilot fulfilling its final destination. It’s like the student in school getting grades based upon what she believes is her comfort zone. It’s like the salesman who sells only so many policies or trinkets. We don’t deviate too much from this self-image we have allowed to exist in our subconscious mind, unless we change our thoughts and create more of a champion’s self-image. And whenever we do deviate some, most of us end up right back on track in no time at all, unless we allow a new belief to take root and grow. We’ve all settled for less, for mediocrity all because of our own self-limited belief system that we have allowed to exist. And if being mediocre doesn’t make you slightly upset, then perhaps this kind of message is just not for you? I know I was a tad upset with myself when I found out that I had settled for less. Who wants to be mediocre? Who wants to become their personal best?
So, the obvious question is how do I change my set point of perspective, my comfort zone and belief I have about myself, and my golf game? Change your thoughts and create a new belief about yourself, gradually shrinking or clearing an old belief that is no longer serving you. You’ve got to activate new and more beneficial beliefs giving more air time to that. Just thinking about what you don’t want, or how to deactivate a less than desirable vibration, only draws more of that into your experience. Our work is to feed our subconscious mind more and more beneficial beliefs and focus. Then, you will see that the better it gets…the better it gets.
Tiger is doing it all the time. He wants to get even better, so he thinks better feeling thoughts. And the better it gets, the better it gets. Eventually, you’ll forget about how things used to be, or that things are just the way they are. Instead of thinking it is what it is…move into a new focus and a more positive belief about what it is you prefer – you literally recreate yourself anew. You move from what-is to what it is you are becoming, what you prefer. It is a simple and as complex as that! And if you do not believe it, then that’s the problem. I’ll show you how to do this and break down any resistances you have that may be preventing you from playing full out to your full potential. That’s the mental, emotional, and spiritual side of golf and life. Ohm…
If you truly do want to change for the better you’ve got to change your thoughts around it. If you keep thinking about that this is just the way it is, or you never get any better, then it will be. You’ve fulfilled the self-fulfilling prophecy. You’ll keep regurgitating the same old story. Therefore create a new story and evolve to getting better than you used to be. You’ve got to think like a Tiger. You’ve got to start thinking like a champion. It works for us mere mortals and amateurs too!
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