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The Fairway Of Life
Simple Secrets To Playing Better Golf By Going With The Flow ~
Rand Scott Marquardt
Life & Mental Golf Performance Coach 
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FacebookSelf-Image: A Return To Being Tiger-like
Needless to say, most people have an opinion regarding the rise and fall of Tiger Woods. I expect an epic movie depicting, at one time, the world’s greatest athlete in the near future. What we don’t yet know is how it all ends? While many experts, like Arnold Palmer and Jack Nicklaus offer us their takes on what it will take for Tiger to return to prominence, only Tiger can write the script. Personally, I believe Tiger has all the talent in the world to become world’s #1 again. It was his dream since early childhood, his father and mother groomed him, and he declared it for himself. Can he return to being #1 in world again? Here is my take.
Tiger has to heal, forgive, and feel good about him Self. He has to heal both physically, emotionally, mentally, and spiritually. In order to be at one’s personal best you must become a match to whom you really are. Essentially, you must love your Self. Life’s most basic challenge is a return to love, a return to being who we really are, a return to being in alignment with our authentic, highest Self. You must love being you, and be at peace with your Self.
According to Janet Helfrich, Mental Skill Development, Sport Psychology Professor at Central Michigan University, “There is a positive correlation between athletes’ feelings about themselves and the way they perform in competition.” Professional golfer Tiger Woods (pre-infidelity) was often seen smiling whether he is on the golf course or talking to reporters.” When asked why he smiles so much Tiger replied, “I like being Tiger Woods.” When his infidelity issue broke Tiger went into a deep seclusion, which lead to some intense counseling. His self-image from what others thought and perhaps what he thought of him Self, was crushed and so it was with his golf game. The world awaits his ascension back to excellence, or not? We are seeing glimpses of that greatness as I write this today. Tiger leads Arnold’s Bay Hill Invitational after two rounds. The buzz is back and according to Ernie Els, so is Tiger.
Tiger’s personal inner journey with his demons and how he makes peace with himself will ultimately determine his fate as an elite champion on the golf course and whether he reaches 19 majors or not? When our mind and emotions are cluttered with all sorts of negative, destructive juju, or other foolish self-sabotaging behaviors it will eventually show up in all aspects of our lives, including our golf game.
For Tiger to return to being Totally Tiger he will have to make peace with his past, and truly learn to totally love himself again. His personal self-image of himself will become and is a direct match to his success or “failure” / results on the golf course.
According to Helfrich, “Our self-image can be defined as the conscious and subconscious image we have of ourselves. This image includes all of our past failures and successes as well as our future assets, liabilities and possibilities. It is an image of how we see ourselves and our future potential of who we are capable of becoming. Since the subconscious mind does not think or reason, it will perform the way it has been programmed. This is why the self-image that we have of ourselves is very powerful and has tremendous influence over our present and future abilities, performances and potential.”
While our self-image can become tainted from what others think of us, we must be careful not to fall into that trap. We are whole, loved, worthy, deserving, and enough just exactly as we are. Many will judge us otherwise; even crucify us. Remember: the one doing the judging, judges themselves. Let go of your need to judge another and you will stop judging yourself so harshly. Let go of your need to judge and simply allow others to be their best along their own journey. After all, everyone is doing the best they can with the tools, knowledge, and resources available to them at this moment in time. Let go of your need to judge and practice the art of simply observing.
Observing versus judging changes everything, including your golf game. It’s a complete paradigm shift in attitude, demeanor, gratitude and self-awareness. Your whole world will turn upside down for the better when you simply observe without judgment and begin to love all of it unconditionally. Observe, notice, become aware, become an objective detective in your own process on and off the golf course versus the raging lunatic that creeps in from time to time before. Look – we all have fallen short, missed the mark, at one time or another and we all keep getting back up. You are forgiven, now it’s just a matter of you realizing it and getting healthy again, getting yourself back up to speed with who you really are. Source sees us as our true, authentic, higher Selves. Become a match to that! Our life challenges are meant for the growth of our own soul. We all have them. We all have the capability to heal, forgive, and love ourselves. We all have the capability to embrace the dark aspects within our shadow, find the gift it brings, love all of who we are, and simply chose again by recreating ourselves anew into the next grandest version of the greatest vision ever we held about who we really are.
Whether it is Tiger’s comeback or our own, we become a direct match to how we think and feel about ourselves. We become what we think!
Rory Wins the 2011 US Open
Congratulations to Rory McIlroy on winning The US Open. McIlroy quoted Muhammad Ali, saying: “It’s repetition of affirmations that leads to belief — and once that belief becomes a deep conviction, things begin to happen.”
Rory spoke with Jack Nicklaus on what it takes to finish the deal. Jack coached him by asking Rory certain questions, like, “What did you learn from the last nine holes at Augusta?”
It’s refreshing to watch a new humble and hungry superstar in the making! It’s refreshing to watch someone with a bounce in their step who doesn’t waste much time over the ball.
Sometimes it’s an inspiring to quote, a solid sounding board to propel you to the next level.
“Be as you wish to seem,” Socrates
I’m out protecting a score
Once you make the commitment to play better golf I guarantee you everything within you will rise to the top – both your brilliance and your demons.
I recently had this conversation with my fellow golfing partner Chris Shepler who is a big fan of The Fairway of Life. He recently played in a “big” tournament – The Northern Michigan Open at Cheboygan CC. Sheppy opened with a 75, one of his best tournament rounds of his career. He wanted to let me know of all the “big time” players in the field, including Golf Professional Brian O’Neill who also opened with a first round 75, and closed with a 71.
Needless to say in round two Chris shot an 85. He tells me, “I completely lost my focus to having fun. I was out there protecting a score and I couldn’t get my mind to hit the ball harder while putting. (Classic deceleration when you are nervous). I was tentative and forgot all about having fun. I let the event to become bigger than it is. I was proud of my 75 in competitive golf and I was out there trying to protect a score. My mind went from here to there; from present – to - I gotta have it. I noticed it, but did not work to get myself back there…I stayed there (meaning I stayed in the abyss of the grind, getting ahead of myself, and not having fun). I also noticed extra frustration building whenever my drives would end up a shorter distance, which meant I would have to hit a longer iron to the green than the day before. I let this irritation translate into ‘it’s going to be tougher to make par versus just playing the shot.’ I know now after the fact that it doesn’t matter what club I am hitting (a five iron or a four iron) - it’s all the same. I did have a good confident thought process early in my second round then when things got away all I could think was I gotta have it. I gotta have a par. And if I don’t have it then I’m screwed (I won’t break 80). And I never made a putt on the second day. I couldn’t figure it out during my round until I got to the 18th tee box, and I finally got up and down because it didn’t matter anymore. Finally, I got up and down. I saw it and I did it.”
I asked Chris, what else happened? He said, “It all boils down to that demon, that devil protecting a score…I gotta have it. Instead of enjoying, I got to have it. I can’t go 3 over right now. Instead of acknowledging the day, I was concerned about my score. The next thing ya know I three-putted for bogey, then at that point I got livid and impatient. I needed it to stay under 80 and have a chance. How stupid is that.” Coach Marquardt, “Then what happened?” Chris, “I couldn’t let it go and went double bogey, double bogey. Then I finally got my s**t together talking to myself on hole #10 and birdied it. Then I pulled hooked a 2-wood on #11 and noticed I cracked the face of my club and went on a bogey train.”
Coach Marquardt, “So Chris, what do you take from this, what did you learn?” Chris, “I learned that I need to focus on being more patient (I’ve never shot a 75 in a golf tournament before) – the more times I’m in this position the better I will become at these situations. It was all a learning experience and I’m okay with it.”
Take from Chris Shepler’s experience on the golf course, as you will. We are all evolving as golfers and human beings to become our very best. I invite you to remember that golf is a great game and it’s all about the enjoying; the scoring will take care of it self. It’s just another round of golf, one stroke at a time. Stay present – play golf in the now. Visualize, visualize, visualize. See it. Also, having to have something in the future takes you out of your present. Wanting something so badly pushes it away. On a side note, I think that’s what happened to Nick Watney in the PGA – he thought about wanting it so badly. I know he believes in having fun. I remind you all – just let it happen. By the way, nothing wrong with a little nervous anxiety, just never let the event to become bigger than it really is. It’s a game of golf. Have fun. Golf is supposed to be fun – and when you get that you can drop the “supposed to” – golf is fun! Remember that – most won’t and they’ll keep repeating the same self-sabotaging behaviors over and over again, until they don’t.
Thanks Chris – next time we’ll here from golf lover Jack Zlotow and what he has taken to the course from The Fairway of Life. Please send any stories you would like to share with the readers. What I find is that others line up right behind the one who steps out and expresses their truth – and we all benefit.
Competitive Spirit & Temper
Competitive Spirit & Temper
Even Tiger Woods can do “better”…
I’ve been, wanting to write about this apparent insidious dichotomy for quite some time. For most of us having a competitive driven spirit with a burning desire to be our best almost seems to go hand in hand with short outbursts of temper tantrums whenever we hit what we consider a bad shot, or we at least give it some internal muttering. Does it have to be this way? Do you have a choice to be angry or not? What I have come to understand is to take the high road whenever I can when it comes to this apparent catch-22. Is it a perfect science, absolutely not! Like all of life, it’s an eternal process to become better than you used to be. You want to get so mad at yourself then finally you decide not too. That’s a big change and a big adjustment in most of our set patterns of behavior. And it is possible to do this WITHOUT losing one ounce of competitive fire, only to gain a “better” golf game in the long run! Is it possible to not lose your temper after a “bad” golf shot and still play your best from here on out? ABSOLUTELY! What do you think?
Geoff Ogilvy came to this understanding of taking the high road several years ago. Now look at his demeanor, without losing one ounce of his competitive fire. In an interview with John Huggan from Golf Digest after winning the 2006 US Open, Ogilvy shared some enlightening insights that he has come to understand with his golf game.
Q: As a young player, were you impatient on the golf course?
A: Oh, yeah. I was horrendous. I could hit five good shots in a row, then one bad one. I’m sure I was a nightmare when I was 16 or 17, as many at that age are.
Q: What sort of stuff did you do?
A: I’d throw clubs around. I broke a few. I used a lot of four-letter words. The temper stuff is easy to fix psychologically. You either get angry or you don’t get angry; you have a choice.
A: I realize now that I was getting angry for everyone else around me, not for me. When you get that, that’s the day you fix it. When you play by yourself, you never smack the bag with the club, or get angry…ever…because there’s no audience. That’s my theory, anyway. After you hit a shot you get angry because you want the person you’re trying to impress to think that you’re better than this. I think that’s the root of it for nine out of ten people. The other one is purely psycho.
Which one are you? Which one am I? Which one is Tiger?
Tiger Woods is still in the process of working through his own self-criticism and impatient issues. He gets mad at himself and drops some four-letter words, or uses the Lord’s name in vain, which I think is just a habit of attraction, not an intentional jab at God or Jesus. He’s stubborn, like many of us, as the day is long. He still thinks he has to get mad at himself whenever he hits a less than desirable shot to keep his fire and competitive spirit, which, by the way, I am certainly not judging. I am merely observing. I have been there most of my adult life.
Tiger states it this way after his comeback tied for 4th place finish in The Masters, “I received some criticism for bad language, which I apologized for immediately after Saturday’s round,” Woods said on his blog. “It’s tough when you’re in a competitive environment and in the flow of a tournament. I’m not perfect. All I can say is I’m trying to do everything I can without losing my fire and competitive spirit.”
The world’s most mentally tough athlete and golfer still struggles with his anger and foul language – perhaps it’s a habitual patterned response? He later apologizes as he seeks to work through this negative perception he is giving the public as a most recognized role model.
The real question is can one control, manage, or “be with” their apparent disgust of their “bad” golf shot while still keeping every bit of their competitive juices flowing? I say absolutely a resounding YES, but I invite you to experiment and experience it on your own. I shared some of this talk with the Petoskey High School golf team recently. Now I share it with a wider audience. These concepts and more are mentioned in my book, The Fairway of Life. Please visit me at http://golfissupposedtobefun.com and sign up for my free newsletter too!
Camilo Villegas wins Honda Classic
Camilo Villegas wins the Honda Classic with a new attitude!
Having worked with sports psychologist Gio Valiante, Camilo is poised to make a run on the PGA Tour. His new attitude is “attitude of gratitude” and to have fun playing golf. Gio suggested Camilo take stock of where he is and just have fun and appreciate. Imagine that! It all comes full circle back to having fun, appreciating, and enjoying the journey. Even golfing great Johnny Miller chimed in, “Appreciate, what a great way of making a living” as Camilo tied a five stroke win with another golfing great, Jack Nicklaus.
Golf is “supposed” to be fun. The “supposed” to be is just a reminder. Professionals are even putting smiley faces on their golf balls as reminders. Isn’t it funny how this fun thing comes full circle. Golf is fun! Too many of us end up taking this golf too damn serious. Hence, frustation sets in. You can’t play your best golf being all pissed off. Lighten up folks and have fun. Guess what, you’ll end up playing better golf simply by appreciating, having fun, and by following your bliss with outrageous joy! Too easy you say? Nah, instead of strugglin’ and trying too hard - just go with the flow ~. The joy is in the journey!
Coaching Andrew Ruthkoski
Andrew is both hungry and humble and now wants to play on the PGA Tour more than ever. I invite him to keep dreaming his dream and visualizing upon the kind of golfer he desires to be. Be as you wish to seem. Act as if it is so. Paint the picture and gravitate towards that. Walk, talk, play, and carry yourself like the champion that you are…all the while lightening up and having fun along the fairway of life. Not to take anything too serious here either. Isn’t being spiritual a weird thing? I know Andrew belongs, now it’s just a matter for him to realize that, similar to Baggar Vance. What will Andrew chose to be next? What will Andrew chose to do next?
Andrew and I texted back and forth on the phone and spoke at length from his disappointing return from Q-School last night while returning from South Carolina. 71-70-69-69 is nothing to be ashamed about. This time he missed by two shots. He has made it to stage II before. For the most part from tee to green his game is pretty darn good. It’s his putting that got the best of him on this particular trip and occasionally he gets ahead of himself out of the present moment thinking he must birdie future holes he hasn’t played yet. I also invite Andrew to think of a lie as just a lie, no judgments, simply an observation. Then commit to the shot.
At Q-School his putting let him down and a few other minor lapses. Like all of us, Andrew occasionally sends mixed messages to himself prior to executing his shots. I call this “vibrational energy” we are feeling. On certain shots he may think where he doesn’t want the ball to go, he sometimes gets in the mindset of having to guide it, and then when it comes to putting and certain shots he, “Wants to lose the junk and mixed messages, a feeling that I want to get rid of.” He said he has played and putted extremely well for the last three months, “now I couldn’t read the grain.” He got into a funk on the green unless he stiffed his shots. Notice when he said he couldn’t…that’s the energy we get back in return, usually in the form of a missed putt. Jack Nicklaus never made a putt that he first didn’t already make in his mind, in how he was visualizing it. There’s a feeling of allowing it v ersus resisting it.
I explain to Andrew that this vibrational energy is about aligning to the Well-Being and allowing that in. It’s about creating more and more beneficial beliefs and not trying to get rid of anything. That’s how we change. With golf shots or anything else we are either allowing the Well-Being in, going with the flow, or we are resisting, kinking up the flow. Resistance comes in many forms. In golf we call them demons: fear, negative thoughts, mixed messages, a limited belief about ourselves, and other foolish self-sabotaging behaviors like; anger; frustration, trying to impress others; or wanting something so badly we end up pushing it further away.
This Well-Being is what golfers call being in The Zone, pure positive energy flowing to and through us in the present moment. We are either allowing this in, or we are resisting it. To be more mentally tough is creating a champions or winner’s self-image by depositing more and more beneficial beliefs into the treasury of our sub-conscious mind. I also provide more insights about these and other enlightening golf mindsets in my new book, The Fairway of Life: Simple Secrets To Playing Better Golf By Going With The Flow. Remember the shot produces the swing, not the other way around.
Andrew knows he has two choices, and one of them doesn’t count. He can either evolve forward becoming better tomorrow than he is today…through his new awareness, or he can quit? Champion’s all overcame adversity by keeping on! Andrew’s asking to become better…and The Universe is answering. You must ASK! Now it is up to Andrew to allow it in. As we send our positive vibes to Andrew they return back to us.
Keep on keeping on!
Be as you wish to seem,
“Coach” Marquardt
Life & Mental Golf Performance Coach
Sport & Athletic Administration, MA
Inspiring Excellence Within!
* The one who wins is always the one who is clearest about his wanting and is most expectant of it. Expectation lies in our vibrational energy and it never lies. It is law. It’s a belief and a feeling of confidence in ourselves, or not? I invite you to post your comments at: http://golfissupposedtobefun.com
Tiger Woods Gives Putting Tip To Sean O’Hair
Day one in the final match of the Fed-Ex Tour Championship on The Golf Channel found Sean O’Hair at the top of the leader board leading Woods, Padraig Harrrington, and Stewart Cink by one shot. And to think on Wednesday’s practice round Sean got a putting tip from Tiger to help sharpen his putting stroke.
Imagine someone helping another while competing with or against each other for the same prize. Well, in my new world I know now that my own toughest opponent is myself, and in ultimate reality I’m really not playing against another. However, competition can stimulate our own desire to become better. All the while we help ourselves by helping others – that’s called the infallible formula. I write about these kinds of concepts (and more) in my new book, The Fairway of Life. Tiger practices mentoring and helping others to become even better themselves. As he does, Tiger naturally becomes better himself. I suggest that you practice this wisdom from the ages as well. Cause another to become what you desire to be even more.
The Putting Lesson
“De-lofting” was Wednesday’s lesson and seems to be the key to O’Hair’s newfound confidence with his flat stick. “I tend to deloft the putter and take it a little too square going back,” O’Hair explained, after telling reporters that Woods’ tips were “a little too complicated for you guys.” Woods suggested that O’Hair add loft to the putter for a freer release through the shot. “If you take it straight back and you deloft it,” O’Hair noted, “you’ve got to hang onto it going through or the ball is going to go dead left.” You have to open up the blade going back in order to properly release the putter blade coming through. *Hint – one of those putting arcs from your local PGA professional will help guide you, unless of course you’re tight with Tiger :).
O’Hair says he has much work to do to elevate his putting. “I’m not even close to doing exactly what [Woods] told me to,” he said. “Let’s face it, [my putting] is kind of what’s held me back for a long time.” The guy has a point. While he’s 17th on the PGA Tour in birdies and scoring averages, O’Hair’s 29.61 putts per round has him languishing in the 159th position.
When asked what’s it like taking tips from the world’s best golfer? O’Hair responded, “Getting advice from good players is obviously awesome,” O’Hair said. “But getting it from basically the greatest of all time is pretty cool.” Woods’ good will was no surprise to O’Hair. “We all know how…great of a player [Woods] is,” O’Hair said. “But I think the thing that impresses me more is the quality of guy he is.” The fact that his golf guru is also his opponent was not lost on O’Hair. “I mean, I’m his competition, and for him to help me out like he did was very classy,” he said. The teacher, for his part, was happy to assist. “It’s very simple,” Woods told reporters. “You always help your friends.”
Having Fun
…And did anyone else pick up on Sean’s comments about taking golf too seriously after the putting tips dialogue? Seems everyone wants to write and talk about Tiger giving advice, which is obviously very cool. O’Hair went on to say that for the last 6-7 weeks he wasn’t having as much fun, kind of down on his game. He said, paraphrasing, ‘after all, this is my profession and I’m supposed to take it seriously [he thought]. Yet when I arrived here I decided to let it all go and was just going to relax more and have fun.’ Sean allowed himself to relax and have some fun with his golf. That’s the big reminder to all of us. How easy it is to fall into the trap that it’s serious. Next thing you know we’re not having fun and our scoring reflects that. So, lighten up and have fun with it! Even professionals have to catch themselves from spiraling downward with the fun quotient. All it takes is a simple shift in perspective and many will not allow themselves to “go there” and have fun – they want to take it sooooo damn serious until it kills em. Have fun and lighten up for God’s sake!!! When you’re having fun, the scoring will take care of itself.
The 2009 Masters
What drama. What story lines. From the poor beginnings as a 10-year old caddy, Argentine Angel Cabrera emerges as The Masters Champion, his second major after winning the 2007 U.S. Open. Angel took pride in never needing a sports psychologist at his side. Instead, he opted for his trusty pack of cigarettes. There is more than one way to skin a cat. If Angel ever does get rattled it’s after some poor execution where he gets down on himself. On this day, for this occasion, he was the one left standing - for himself and perhaps - for the memory and honor of his fellow countrymen Roberto De Vicenzo.
The 2009 Masters began with some fireworks right from the get-go. The cool Texan, Chad Campbell, started off in record setting form opening with 5 straight birdies. Kenny Perry was playing on house money having accomplished more than he ever imagined with his golf. “Everything is a bonus,” he told us. He’s grateful and appreciative, a true gentlemen and sportsman. He set his goal to play in the 2008 Ryder Cup and now to win 20 times on tour and compete in majors. Everything is going along according to hoyle. It always does. The universe is always yielding to our desires and our asking; now it is up to us to allow it in. Anthony Kim found out he was taking his first round at Augusta National Golf Club way too serious. With the tragic death of Angel’s baseball pitcher, Nick Adenhart, it put it all into perspective for Kim. Life is a precious gift, “That could’ve been me,” he said with a somber heart. Kim set a Masters record with 11 birdies in his second round of golf, posting a 65.
Then came Sunday. First it was Phil to make a charge, next it was Tiger. The roars were deafening throughout the tall pines and magnolias, several groups ahead of the leaders. Everyone was following the two giants - the energy was maddening. The stage was set for a memorable Masters. Then Phil missed two short putts, and Tiger bogeyed…again. Soon after #’s 1 & 2 in the world exited the stage, three were left standing.
Besides the sheer exhilaration of just watching such an event, Nick Faldo provided extraordinary commentary into his own psyche, a past 3-time Masters Champion in 1989, 1990, and 1996. Personally, I resonate with his philosophy more than any other. On the inside I’m not too sure if Faldo’s philosophy is too much different than Cabrera’s mental mindset. It’s just a matter of what works and how we end up believing in ourselves, or not? Cabrera came from nothing but pure desire and sure will. He emerged from the caddy ranks onto the biggest stage of them all - winning a green jacket. Faldo had dreams too. He set intentions; he let his will and his belief in himself turn him into the champion that he is. He practiced training his mind. The key is to find out which way works for you.
Faldo says, “You really got to believe you will make everything. Today I will hole everything.” In order to pull off the shots you need:
Inner courage
Inner knowing
Inner self-belief
Faldo says, “What it takes is to be totally in the moment.” You need:
Creative visualization
A wonderfully def touch
And from high above the Georgia pines the golfing gods on your side
Faldo talks about meditating and how the new guys look at him and say, what’s that? He talks about how he used to meditate twice a day, which allows him to become more present, more peaceful, and helps set the tone and intention for his day and his round.
I write about all of these things in my book, The Fairway of Life: Simple Secrets To Playing Better Golf By Going With The Flow due out in mid-May. The best way is to find out what way works for you. Remember: my way is merely one-way and there are plenty of paths. Do you like what you are seeing with the results in your golf game? Are you making strides? What small action step can you take today that will make you a better you and a better player tomorrow?
Perhaps we can all agree that no matter what: life and golf is supposed to be fun!
Phil Mickelson – Practicing the Infallible Formula
In all my years in life coaching and life education: in processing, growing, and evolving, perhaps the quickest way to get you from where you are to where you desire to be is by practicing the Infallible Formula. Once you’re on your path of where you desire to be through your dreams, desires, visualizations and of course taking action, practicing the Infallible Formula will provide a new level of understanding. They say a great teacher teaches what they desire to learn or understand the most. The Infallible Formula states: cause another to become that which you desire to be your self. That’s exactly what Mickelson is doing now, and what other PGA teaching professionals have been doing all along. It’s why they get better themselves.
Phil Mickelson was interviewed this past weekend during his fine play in the 2009 CA Championship at Doral – The Blue Monster in Miami. Phil was describing the Infallible Formula in his words of how he understood that you teach what you want to be yourself. “Simplifying my techniques and to articulate and translate it so everybody can do it has forced me to simplify my own game and, consequently, I’ve never chipped or hit bunker shots as well,” said Mickelson, who added that he has never felt so good standing over a shot in his career as he does these days. Not too mention the way he’s freewheeling his Galloway FT-9 driver as well.
Mickelson recently put out a short-game video for the masses and said that has helped his own precision game get to be “as good as it’s ever been.” Gosh, here I thought he was already pretty dang good – one of the best in world. Now, he’s even better than he used to be!
Excerpts from Chapter 10 – Golf Vices of The Fairway of Life: Simple Secrets To Playing Better Golf By Going With The Flow ~.
Coaches Notes: Encourage others you play with to be there best and this will make you a better golfer. * In 2009 this formula is making Phil Mickelson a better short game player because he’s causing others to be better with their short game. Plus he articulates and practices the simplicity of his message at the same time. Isn’t it a lot more fun when the both of you are playing well? And if the other plays well enough to win the prize congratulate them on their fine play. Never root against another, never hope another misses, and never play for the money. Phil truly desires that Tiger will get back to being his best. The thrill of competition stimulates our desire to be our best. Play your game to the best of your God-given talent and perhaps you’ll inspire another to be their best as well. Remember: life is like a circle. What you do for another, you also do for yourself. And what you do for yourself, you also do for another. Do it with pureness of heart, with kind spirit, and genuine compassion, and your life will be blessed even more. And so shall it be.
Geoff Ogilvy – A model of ideal demeanor
Geoff Ogilvy is playing in the finals of the World Golf Championship Match Play event this weekend against Paul Casey, another cool cucumber when it comes to going with the flow. As we often hear from golf announcers Ogilvy wasn’t always this way. The following dialogue is an excerpt from The Fairway of Life: Simple Secrets To Playing Better Golf By Going With The Flow ~ due out very soon.
The challenge for most people is that they do not embrace, and cannot accept their bad golf shots and end up hanging on to their negative energy, which once again draws them back out of The Zone. If you cannot accept what you do not like, you will keep repeating those same behaviors over and over and over again. What you resist; persists. It’s a Catch 22: You want to get mad at your bad golf shots or what you might consider bad breaks, yet the more angry or frustrated you get, the slower the process to change and get better. Anger and frustration only keeps us stuck in a never-ending repetitive cycle. Anger and frustration do not exist in The Zone . . . you won’t either. The challenge is acceptance of “what is” so you can move into what you prefer. And once you begin to accept what just happened, you will evolve much quicker to what you prefer. Once you stop beating up on yourself and relax you start playing better. Works every time and you know that! The challenge is the discipline in the moment. All you have is this moment. You do have a choice.
Simple Secret Reminder # 20 - You Have a Choice: To Be Angry, or Not
Remember: What you resist persists
Interview excerpts with Geoff Ogilvy – 2006 US Open Champion
By John Huggan, Golf Digest June 10, 2007
Q: As a young player, were you impatient on the golf course?
A: Oh, yeah. I was horrendous. I could hit five good shots in a row, then one bad one, but remember only the bad one. I’m sure I was a nightmare when I was 16 or 17, as many at that age are.
Q: What sort of stuff did you do?
A: I’d throw clubs around. I broke a few. I used a lot of four-letter words. The temper stuff is easy to fix psychologically. You either get angry or you don’t get angry; you have a choice.
I realize now that I was getting angry for everyone else around me, not for me. When you get that, that’s the day you fix it. When you play by yourself, you never smack the bag with the club, or get angry…ever… because there’s no audience. That’s my theory, anyway. After you hit a shot you get angry because you want the person you’re trying to impress to think that you’re better than this. I think that’s the root of it for nine out of 10 people. The other one is purely psycho.
Geoff Ogilvy is in the process of mastering his own mental toughness, and it shows by his outward expression of being calm more often than before. Does he still kick his putter and want to scream bloody murder? Sure, who doesn’t? The key is to be able to ground yourself and find a way to either accept or allow this negative emotion to pass through you. If we truly seek to obtain optimal results it begins with a calm heart and self-control.
“A calm heart and self-control are necessary if one is to obtain good results. If we are not in control of ourselves but instead let our impatience or anger interfere, then our work is no longer of any value. Keeping your attention focused, alert, ready to handle ably and intelligently any situation which may arise—this is mindfulness.”
—Thich Nhat Hanh, The Miracle of Mindfulness
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